The Soul Search

I have learned in the past year that just when you think you know who you are..that "you" that is so familiar, can wander out of your usual field of view.
In its place a stranger may just walk in.
This happened to me this year.
I had no idea what to do with this person who was my unfamiliar.
She was not comfortable in her own skin at all, and constantly wanted to escape such a foreign land her mind had become.

She wanted to go back to what she knew: a safe, sound and very strong spirit. Where the ground never seemed to shake with each step taken.
But that didn't happen as painlessly as she had wished.
It hurt, worse than anything has ever hurt before, that slow tumble from self.
and then I learned that
sometimes we have to fall ...all the way down,
before we can pull ourselves back up again.
With a hopeful heart
I think I may be starting to stand...
or at least placing on foot solidly on the ground.

It has been quite the year, thank you for all the love and support you all have give me. xoxo

Wishing all my readers and friends a peaceful and loving holiday season.

Love this photo of my son and his girlfriend. He looks so sweet!
Things have been busy here, per usual. Wrapping up my two online classes, hopefully this week. I have started a pile of magazines to catch up during break, mostly photog ones!
Getting ready for Christmas, but am no ball of fire with it! Maybe now that the push is on I will go into overdrive to get ready, sometimes that works, right? Perhaps some creative time coming up too! I have missed it! No jewelry design for months. My sad little supplies just sit on a table to the left of me starring at my back.

Happy, smiling, if only on the inside..filled with glee! I did a photo shoot with my partner today, for He Said She Said Photography. It was a blast! My son and his girlfriend posed for us, both are just stunning. Now I have lots of new photos to play with!
I can honestly say I had a good weekend. Well a majority of it. Which is saying something for me as of late! Saturday night I sat around a fire with my husband and a few friends. I haven't laughed so hard in ages. They were talking of "the old days", when they used to get away with, or in some cases, get caught..doing things they shouldn't be doing. If they only knew how thankful I was for those a few hours of laughing! Learning to hold onto to happy moments.
The holiday season is here. And really, I could care less. But I am trying. My mom wouldn't want me to feel bad. And I of all people should know to make the most of every single day. So, I guess I will make that my goal for now. I miss her so much. I will do it in her honor though. She was my biggest fan, my favorite person to talk to, to share my art and buy gifts for at Christmas. It really only mattered what she thought of my work, isn't that how it is for all of us? As long as our mom loves it, that is all that counts. So mom's out there..let your children know how special they are.